To cremate or not to cremate?

In April 21st USA Today on page 3A there was an article written by Chris Joyner called “Cremation industry awaits tougher controls.” While I thought that this article was very well written, I did encounter a few problems, well issues that I personally thought were some problems. I felt like the writer did more background research more than personal, interview type of research. While there was a good amount of information provided to the reader, it kind of felt like a tease because the writer didn’t supply enough detail on all the information provided.  I also would have liked to see more quotes from more sources. I also had some questions that I felt were left answered in the article. First off, what does Joyner mean by regulating cremation? How do they regulate? What are these regulations in each state? How do they determine between honest and dishonest operators? Or is there nothing to determine this by?  I also wanted to know why do they think people are choosing cremation lately? Why do they think the rate of people choosing cremation has increased? Even though having the writer’s opinion would be bias to the article, it would have been interesting to know; instead the writer could have quoted someone who gathered these statistics.

The last thing about the article was while I thought that lead of the article was great, I did think that it sounded more like a feature lead more than like a straight news lead. Even though there is no problem with feature leads, I felt like the rest of the article didn’t seem to fit into a feature news story. 

NASA Intern hopes for Space Walk–acts as model we all should live our lives by

The Onion reported on a Columbia University cultural anthropology major interning at NASA whose goal is to walk on the moon before his internship expires in Late June. Ryan Hodson lists his people skills, stellar work habits, and outgoing personality as sufficient credentials in joining the NASA astronaut crew.

This story is one of the most positive, uplifting stories I’ve read in a while, and that, in my opinion, gives it its newsworthiness. A guy my age whose out refilling staples, organizing magazines in the break rooms, and moving the cold sodas to the front of refrigerators has dreams and ambitions that are impregnable. He’s faced some steadfast resistance from higher ups who say that they will never allow an intern to participate in a space walk. Hodson, however, brushes that aside claiming that that’s what they say to all the interns so they don’t get their hopes up. Hodson has been busy dropping hints and voluntarily providing his experience with g-forces and advertises that he doesn’t need the training to go to space–which will save NASA hundreds of thousands of dollars.

The publishing of this story is really important to people living in the discouraging times we live in. The fact that there is someone out there who is putting his dreams and ambitions on the highest shelf is a model that everyone should live by. He’s going against the status quo of just accepting failure and that egregious word that we’ve been hearing too much of lately: “No!”

Transsexuals

In a story found in The New York Times about Transsexuals is very well written.  The writer tackles the very complex political and law issues surrounding very well, and uses clever rhetoric to display these complexities. 

In the 11th paragraph the author does the best job of this by using a long list of how a transgendered person will be percieved as she/he travels across different borders and cities to sue for the wrongful death of her/his husband.  It is written without ever repeating phrases, but instead rewords phrases which furthers shows how dizzying this situation can be. 

There is also a good deal of different sources in the story which makes it much more informative instead of argumentative, although the beginning could be seen as arguing that the law is not doing its job.  This may also be why the rep from the IRS declined to comment for the story.

This story uses a kind of a feature format where it begins and ends with a personal-human insterest focus on one family.  And all the stuff in the middle is what the story is actually about–identifying what transgendered people face before and after a surgery. 

Few Brave Enough to Risk Shark Attack

USA Today reported on the California shark attack and the aftermath of this event.  Friday, a shark attacked a triathlete 14 miles down the shore from San Diego.

This article used the inverted pyramid method of news writing, starting out with the lead.  I found this lead to be a decent one, as it included the who, what, where, and when of the story.  The article then went from specific information to general, ending with some basic information about shark attacks in the United States.

One aspect of this story that I liked, was that the reporter used quotes from both a person who braved the possibility of a shark in the water and a person who decided to stay on land for one weekend out of the year.  This provided both sides of opinion about the shark attack.  I also liked the fact that the writer included information on previous shark attacks in the United States, including the latest ones and the last fatal one that is known.

To round out this story, the writer also included general information about sharks, allowing the reader to have the whole picture, instead of limiting it to this one, isolated incident of a shark attack.  Overall, I found this to be one of the better articles that I have read from USA Today.

Lasik surgery: more regulation to end help end ignorance

As federal health advisers seek to further clarify warnings of the risks of Lasik eye surgery to patients, an AP author’s review of the case for such warnings really hits home.  The author’s lead is powerfully gripping: The story opens with “In fury and despair, patients harmed by Lasik eye surgery told federal health advisers Friday of severe eye pain, blurred vision and even a son’s suicide.  The advisers recommended that the government warn more clearly about the risks of the hugely popular operations.”  These two sentences provoke further reader commitment by establishing the captivating aspect of the story, which is that it provides information about a procedure that is apparently risky, yet still “hugely popular.”  Although, in general, the remainder of the story makes Lasik’s risks seem reasonably tolerable when compared to its likely benefits, the author was wise to open the story with an alarming assessment of the procedure because it is more attention-grabbing than a rosy one would have been.  Besides, the remote–yet real–danger of the operation establishes the basis of the news.  

 

Comprehensive and balanced attention to both sides of the issue sum up further qualities of the story.  It provides touching testimonials from injured Lasik patients who push for clearer warnings.  It balances those testimonials with fairly safe-looking statistics on the operation.  The result is an unbiased piece that reveals all the information one could want to know about both the controversy and the basics of the procedure.  To round it all out, the sidebars offer explanations to readers’ procedural inquiries, including insight into what doctors should consider foreboding warning signs in characteristics of potential patients.  

 

The human-interest angle, intertwined with straight-forward reporting of a timely and, in a way, controversial issue, is the lure for the reader.  Hook, line, and sinker were the pros and cons, which built an insightful and enticing, back-and-forth argument for better understanding of, more regulation for, and future studies on the practice of Lasik.   

 

 

Bush is giving away money!

In a recent travel article from Friday’ s USA Today edition, I found an article discussing the rebate checks that are meant to boost the economy. 

 

 Laura Bly, the article’s author, did a great job of showcasing the use of an inverted pyramid style in “Travel industry wants you- and your rebate“. 

 

Furthermore, Bly uses statistical data in her article which I have not previously seen in article when looking for pieces to critique.    Bly switches between using data provided by USA Today polls as well as outside sources such as interviews and documents. 

 

In addition, the flow of Bly’s article allowed for the reader to easily comprehend the copious amount of information she provided.   

 

She also figuratively draws an image in the reader’s mind of the possibilities and choices of what to do with their money.  Interestingly,  she also provides a snapshot of a regular American and what they decided to do with their rebate check. 

Nicole Kidman Profile

I thought it would be most appropriate this week to actually talk about a profile piece since I am working on one of my own. The story about Nicole Kidman in USAToday on April 23 talked specifically about Nicole Kidman and her work as a U.N. Ambassador. This particular piece also focused on her work on the U.N. Development Fund for Women.

Although the story does focus a little on the specific U.N. Development Fund for Women the way the journalist structures the story as if Nicole Kidman is the focus. She basically is featured as the most newsworthy event in the story. She is in the lead and then most of the background is given about her and her history in the U.N. I thought this would be a good route for the journalist because she has a very high prominence and can attract readers. The only criticism I have for the piece deals with the last few paragraphs of the story. I don’t think the journalist needs to include the background of Kidman’s marital status or the latest movie she will be in. This story is highly focused on Kidman’s participation in the U.N. and I think the focus should stay on that subject and not diver to her personal life or career as an actress.

Know your flight rights but don’t read the article

I have read many stories in USA Today that have included unnecessary info-graphs and sidebars. Many times, such additions provide redundant information in a slightly different form than it appeared in the story with the sole purpose of filling up space. Such stories would be better served by cutting out the charts, graphs and bullet lists and finding a more useful purpose for the extra space.

 

In the recent article “Knowing rights if flight’s canceled may get you a seat” I found just the opposite to be true. The article highlights the importance of knowing your air travel rights in a time when wide-spread cancellations are becoming more frequent. An anecdotal lead starts the story out, followed by a paragraph highlighting a rise in airline cancellations that has left hundreds of thousands of passengers stranded in recent weeks. The story then introduces Rule 240, a “secret weapon” that supposedly offers fliers a remedy when faced with long delays and grounded flights. Details follow in the next paragraphs which explain where the rule originated, how to use the rule and other useful information for travelers. After that point in the story I stopped reading the actual article because of the large info-graph smack-dab in the middle of the page. The graphic lists all of the major airlines with a breakdown of how to use Rule 240 and what consumers can expect when using the rule with each different company. Basically, the box provides the most important, most relevant information travelers could want from the article without them having to read the entire thing. In this case, the sidebar overshadows the written article to a fault, distracting readers like me from even finishing the story.

 

Too much information?

In last weeks USA Today there was an article in section A written by Calum MacLeod called “Chinese rally round their own in defense against protesters.” While the article was really well written, I have to admit I was pretty lost the first time I read it. While there was a lot of information provided that was informative, interesting and relevant to the article, a lot of questions were unanswered. I think that when including all this information, readers in return are left with more questions that remain unanswered in the article. Therefore I felt that maybe there was too much information in this article because the article seemed to bounce around from one idea to the next, and in the end I questioned what the main purpose and point of the article really was. Some of the questions that I had and remained unanswered in my opinion were: Why were there protests dogging the torch relay? Why is the torch relay called the “Journey of Harmony?” What harsh rule in Tibet? Why does the Chinese government claim that the foreign news media is biased against China? Why does Tang blame the western news media for bringing trouble on itself? While these may seem like unimportant questions, I happened to find them important in order for the reader to understand the article. I think it becomes extraneous when a bunch of different information is divulged and with that information, more questions arise that remain unanswered. 

I thought that the article was really well written, and had a great lead that set up the rest of the article. The article was also very informational, so it was obvious that the writer did a lot of research for this article. The article also had some great sources, however, personally as a reader I would have liked to read a quote or statement about how the protesters themselves feel. 

Reinstatement of the death penalty

I found an interesting article in USA Today regarding the reinstated rule of the death penalty. The article was intriguing because I actually didn’t know that June of 2006 was when the Supreme Court decided to stall the executions. The article was entitled “States move on executions,” and it caught my attention.

It did leave me with a few questions: When did the Supreme Court decide to stall on the death penalty issue? What were the reasons? How many people were scheduled to be on death row for the past two years then? I thought the article was interesting and was an interesting topic; however, it spoke to an audience that knew the answers to these questions. Otherwise, the reader could be left confused. This is an enormous issue and one that readers might want to know more about.

Teller pregnant with twins shot in robbery

The article “Teller pregnant with twins shot in robbery” on msnbc.com is pretty much your ideal news story. I was surprised by how much this article followed the traditional journalistic rules we’ve been taught in class, since that usually isn’t the case in today’s news stories.

The lead clearly spells out who may have been involved (two teenagers), what happened (shot a pregnant teller), where it occurred (Indianapolis), and when it took place (Tuesday morning).

One thing I noticed in this article is that early on the writer lets the reader know that the woman is in critical condition. This is something I’ve noticed that most news writers are good at doing: giving the most important information, even if it happened last, early on in the piece. One of my big mistakes at the beginning of this semester was that I would leave those important details until the end of the story. Seeing writer after writer give bits of crucial information early in their stories has helped remind me to follow this way of organizing the content in my news stories.

The second paragraph, and other paragraphs that follow, basically reword the lead in a more specific way, which is one of the key things to remember in news writing. In class this semester, when Professor Dehnart mentioned that paragraphs in inverted pyramid style should be written this way, I started noticing that that is exactly how good news stories are written. As soon as I started applying this rule, I started getting the hang of writing inverted pyramid style news stories.

The second paragraph names one of the police officers involved and gave a little more detail about the teller. As the story progresses, the writer gives details about the shooting which enhance the story, but aren’t necessary. The writer also starts including more quotes from the police chief and another police spokesman as the story progresses, to give some extra insight into the case.

As well as being written in inverted pyramid style, this story is also newsworthy because it has proximity (since it happened in the United States) and timeliness (since it happened this morning). This article has a great deal of impact. A story about a woman and her two unborn children being put in danger usually has an emotional impact on readers, and therefore has news value. It also has impact because everyone goes to the bank, so technically this could happen to anyone. This story could hit a lot of readers close to home.

Stuff Happened in Philly concerning Obama–thought you should know…

This article I read about Obama’s status in Philadelphia was really smooth and enjoyable to read. The language is barely editorialized but it has essence of a feature, which I think is very tastefully done. Added with that the article’s content, the story makes for an interesting read.

The journalist does a good job of painting the situation in a retrospective kind of way. They do a good job of using quotes to get the mood of what’s been going on up in Philly concerning the Presidential race. Even the speeches have been described thoughtfully so that the essence of the mood was captured. I noticed that the journalist didn’t focus on the subject matter of the speeches, but rather the entire atmosphere, which faithfully stuck with the news: Obama’s status in Philadelphia.

Sect Mothers Separated From Kids

USA Today continued their report on the sect that was raided in Texas two weeks ago.  The writer focused on information regarding the DNA tests that are currently being conducted, as well as the process by which authorities are splitting up the sect families.

However, I found that the writing was, in general, very confusing to read and to understand.  The writer reports on the relationships between individuals and how the DNA tests will prove these relationships.  This information is not presented in a very clear manner, though.  Also, it is not clear as to how the families are to be split up.  The article mentions that siblings will be kept together when they are moved to other facilities, yet it is unclear as to if step-siblings are included in that, especially since there are a variety of relationships among siblings due to the unique nature of the sect.

It also confuses me as to how they can conduct these hearings with over 400 children among two courtrooms.  The entire process sounds like it will take a very long time to sort out, and who is looking out for these children during this process?  And how are the leaders and adults of this sect being judged and under what rule of thumb?  It can be expected that a great deal of confusion will be a result of this particular case.

The Pope Visits

I took a look at the atricle from the New York Times called “Pope Begins 3-Day Visit to New York.”  This article had a very informative intro that summarized the pope’s planned activities for his visit, and then went into a discussion of how he has been reaching out to other religions, American Catholic schools, and victims of sexual-abuse at the hands of priests. 

However, since the title and lead support a story that will summarize his visit and activities one would expect the story to do that.  But it does not.  Instead the story focuses on a couple of his current activities, and it seemed that the most emphasis was placed on his meeting with the victims of sexual-abuse.  This is the most heated topic, but the reader is expecting a summary of events, and there was lots of discussion on this topic, only a few lines on his mass at the new Nationals Stadium.  I think if the reporter hd wanted to focus on the sexual-abuse victims, to reflect that in the title and lead, and then could have used the other information on the pope’s visit as background information to go at the end of the piece like he/she did.

The following line was what ended the piece, and it had one part that made me reread it a couple times to make sure I understood what it was saying. “Steve Brown, 55, a doctor from Fairfax, Va., said seeing the pope was particularly important to him because he is suffering from terminal cancer”  Now, it may have made sense to some (I will admit to being a little sleep-deprived from Senior Research), but the author used him and he in the same sentence where he has two subjects, Steve Brown, and the pope.  When I read it the first time, I thought that this doctor was interested in seeing the Pope, because the Pope had cancer and he wanted to see how it was affecting him.  I stopped.  That cannot be right, the pope is in excellent health.  Then it made sense and I realized that it was the doctor who has cancer and was seeking spiritual support from the Pope.  To make this sentence clearer I think it should have read: “Steve Brown, 55, a doctor from Fairfax, Va., said seeing the pope was particularly important to him because Brown is suffering from terminal cancer.”  I know it is usch a nitpicky thing, but it makes this sentence so much clearer, and to end a story with this, it had better make sense and be strong.

Hearing for polygamists’ kids grinds to a halt

The article “Hearing for polygamists’ kids grinds to a halt” on msnbc.com does an effective job of summing up the 5 W’s in the lead. The reader gets all of the important information in this first sentence. “A court hearing” is the first phrase, which accurately comes first in importance, since the article focuses on the court hearing.

The “who” is the court, the “what” is that the court hearing came to a halt in deciding what to do with the children taken into custody, the “where” is San Angelo, Texas, the “when ” is Thursday (today), and the “why’ is because hundreds of lawyers wanted to study the evidence of the case before it could be introduced. This is an extremely clear lead that gives me as a reader all the summed up information I need to know about the court hearing.

The article then moves into further detail, appropriately following the inverted pyramid, for those that want more detail or need more information because they haven’t already been following the case.

In inverted pyramid style, more details about the case and why the children are being taken into custody are found in the middle of the article. An explanation of the church’s background, detailed description of the scene and FLDS mothers’ appearances, and quotes from some of the fathers come later on in the story as the article gets into more specifics that could be left out if necessary.

As I’ve said in some of my previous blogs, few articles actually follow journalistic rules and inverted pyramid style today, leaving readers confused or without pertinent information that should have been mentioned in the lead. This article, however, was very clear and gave me what I needed to know right from the start. For an article two-pages long, it was definitely the best way to lay out the information.